


A Necessary Sacrifice

by puddlejumper38



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Angst, Episode Tag, Episode: s04e02 Lifeline, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-27
Updated: 2014-12-27
Packaged: 2018-03-03 20:45:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2886935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puddlejumper38/pseuds/puddlejumper38
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On days like these, John wondered why he’d ever left Antarctica, where all he’d had to do was fly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Necessary Sacrifice

Rodney was stalking him. After three days, John was one hundred percent certain of it. Every time he turned around Rodney seemed to be there, with the notable exceptions of when he was with either Ronon or Teyla. Sure, they usually spent a fair amount of time together but it wasn’t as if Rodney didn’t have important work to do, say, like _fixing the damn city_.

It was seriously pissing John off, to the point where he’d made a small but clearly deliberate effort to shake off Rodney. Whether by design or his general obliviousness, Rodney had yet to take the hint, if anything the surveillance seemed to be getting worse. John swore Rodney had not-so-subtly been using a lifesigns detector last time he’d seen him.

John didn’t think it was too much to ask to have some _goddamn privacy_. He was pretty close to confronting Rodney about it, but John was really, really not in the mood for an argument with Rodney. Not another one.

That had meant coming up with a Plan B.

Rodney could hardly follow him if he took a Jumper out. Frankly, John would have liked to spend a day or five on the new mainland away from everyone, everything, but his current position made that impossible.

So John was going to take the Jumper out for a spin, just to clear his head. It wasn’t as if there was anyone to stop him, not anymore.

He _did_ tell Chuck he was going and that he should only be called back in the case of a _real_ emergency. As if they hadn’t had enough of those recently.

John slammed the Jumper up off the floor, more aggressively than strictly necessary, and waited for the roof to retract.

‘Come on,’ John muttered, and it seemed to be moving agonisingly slowly, but _finally_ it was open and John was free.

He raced away from the city, bringing the Jumper down close near the water, inches from skimming the surface, then banked steeply upwards as he approached the planet’s mainland. John reached forward and dialled down the inertial dampeners, enough to feel the tight turns _without_ getting flattened.

This was better. This was easier. Concentrating on the flight, on the manoeuvres, keeping his mind totally focused on the Jumper. On days like these, John wondered why he’d ever left Antarctica, where all he’d had to do was fly.

_Beep, beep._

Jerked out of his zone, John glared accusingly at the speaker, before narrowing his eyes further as the HUD popped up, tracking a single Jumper following roughly following his flight path.

John was being followed and he’d bet anything that he knew who by.

‘Follow _this_ ,’ John growled, sending the Jumper spiralling up and up through the outer atmosphere and into the edge of space.

He’d clearly taken Rodney by surprise, but to John’s annoyance the other Jumper sped after him.

That was the last straw. John had no idea why Rodney felt the need to stick to him but he sure as hell wasn’t going to have the conversation over the radio. Adopting a more reasonable flight path, John swung back down into the atmosphere and towards the mainland.

By the time Rodney landed next to him, John was standing, arms folded, in the open hatch of his Jumper.

‘What the _hell_ are you doing?’

Rodney stopped at the edge of his Jumper’s ramp and jerked his chin up. ‘I could ask the same question.’

‘No,’ said John, advancing on him. ‘No, you couldn’t. It was bad enough you watching my every move in the city. So, I’ll ask again, what the hell is your problem?’

‘I haven’t been following you,’ said Rodney, so automatically John suspected it was a prepared speech. Then his face flushed at John’s challenging raised eyebrow. ‘Fine. But I was right to, wasn’t I?’

Huh? John scowled again, whatever leap Rodney’s brain had made this time, it was clearly way off target.

‘You wanna explain that one to me?’

‘Oh no, you don’t,’ Rodney said, and John didn’t like his expression. ‘You know exactly what I’m talking about, have you forgotten I just followed your little space flight?’

‘My ‘little space flight’,’ said John, employing air quotes for maximum effect. ‘Was supposed to make you take the hint and _back off_.’

‘Oh, really?’ said Rodney, getting close enough that John was tempted to shove him back. ‘It wouldn’t have anything to do with the nearby space gate. Nearby in relative terms, of course.’

John didn’t shove Rodney, instead he stepped forward and got right in Rodney’s face. ‘What goddamn space gate? You can either explain it to me, _right now_ , or get lost.’

Rodney stepped back, just a little, but it was satisfying in a really petty way.

‘Do we have to do this?’ Rodney said. ‘We both know you were off to the replicator world and I can’t let you do that, not now, and not later when I’m busy with something that I can’t immediately drop when you take a Jumper out.’

‘Christ, Rodney.’ John turned away. That explained _everything_ , but did Rodney honestly think he was that _stupid_?

‘Don’t you think we all want her back?’ Rodney was demanding and god John didn’t want to deal with this. ‘It just isn’t possible, even if we could get there, get in, there’s no guarantee-‘

‘That she’d even be herself.’ John scrubbed a hand over his face. So much for flying away from it all. ‘I _know._ I wasn’t going anywhere. I _can’t_ go anywhere. We barely escaped to get here, I can’t go off half-assed to the fucking _replicators_ because it would kill every single person she gave herself up to save. Do you think I don’t _know that_?’

‘Oh,’ said Rodney, looking wide eyed at John. ‘You weren’t…?’

John sat down on the ramp. ‘I was just taking the Jumper out, Rodney.’

‘Oh,’ said Rodney again and sat down next to him.

John stared out over at Rodney’s Jumper.

‘So,’ said Rodney, cautiously. ‘Uh, you’ve not going to try anything then? Because, honestly? This isn’t your fault, it’s mine as much as anyone’s.’

John shook his head. ‘It’s not your fault either.’

‘She saved all of us, you know.’ Rodney gazed up at the sky.

‘And we left her there.’ The words slipped out before John could stop them.

He heard Rodney swallow nervously and cursed himself for putting Rodney in this position. As if it wasn’t hard enough on everyone already. He should have just stayed in Atlantis like a good expedition leader. _Acting_ expedition leader.

‘I won’t go off on my own, but I’m damn well not giving up on her.’ John turned to face his friend. ‘There’s got to be a way. I’ll speak to whoever I have to, but if there’s a chance, then I’m finding the resources to take it.’

‘Well, yes.’ Rodney shifted beside him. ‘Um. I actually really need to get back, I might have been in the middle of some important repairs.’

And he’d dropped everything to come after John. In a strange way, John appreciated the effort.

Rodney had stood up and was looking expectantly at him.

‘I’ll head back in a minute.’ John leaned back. ‘That’s a promise.’

Rodney must have believed him, because he turned, albeit reluctantly, and headed back into his own Jumper. John watched until it disappeared into the horizon.

He bowed his head and sighed but remained sitting.

‘I’ll come for you,’ John told the empty air, words he could never say in the control room, in Atlantis, where it would have seemed more fitting. ‘But I promise I won’t sacrifice what you fought for to do it.’

Elizabeth Weir. Of all the people he had ever known, she would most appreciate the effort he was making to stay put. Even when all his instincts screamed at him to go back.


End file.
